Confucius Say:A Magazine is a bunch of printed pages that tell you what’s coming in the next issue.Confucius Say:A Cannibal is person who likes to see other people stewed.Confucius Say:An Optimist is a girl who regards a bulge as a curve.Confucius Say:A Shotgun wedding is a case of wife or death.Confucius Say:A penis has a hole in the end so men can be open minded.Confucius Say:Watch a woman eat an ice cream cone and you’ll have a pretty good idea how she’ll be in bed.Confucius Say:Man with five dicks will have pants that fit like a glove.Confucius Say:It’s ok to let a fool kiss you, but don’t let a kiss fool you.Confucius Say:To reuse a condom, turn it inside out and shake the f*ck out of itConfucius Say:Men screw with dicks; women screw with minds.Confucius Say:Masturbation is a solo played on a private organ.Confucius Say:Mother’s Day comes nine months after father’s day.Confucius Say:A kiss is just shopping upstairs for downstairs merchandise.Confucius Say:It’s all right to sit on. The satisfaction I felt when they did not fit me...I remember it well.Dry and dressed, I moved downstairs carefully, still assuming my currentphysicality was as transitory and fragile as my own sanity. It was in my kitchen that I first met Harry Slazenger."Well, Hello there, Miss!" he said, his smile as bright as the jacket of hissuit. He told me his name and passed me a business card. I didn't read it I never do."Hi?" I replied, naturally concerned about his presence in my kitchen... this had to be a dream. What else could it be?"I guess you must be mighty confused, right now, huh?" He had the look of a preacher, but haven't met very few I could not be sure.I raised an eyebrow at him before responding. "Surprized is better, I think. Worried it's going to end any minute."He laughed warmly. "No, no... it ain't going to end. You're a woman, and that's that." I'm dreaming, right?" Now, come on... does this feel like a dream to you? Why, I could kinda get upset thct you think of me as.
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